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Top 3 Tricks To Get A Girl Off

Come on fellas.


Let’s face it fellas. You may have the looks, the equipment, and the mental tools, yet you’re still not getting your girl to put on that “O” face quite as often as you would like. How could that be you say? You have sick moves, right? You work the circular tornado twister better than anyone in the business, right?


What most guys don’t realize is that getting a girl to climax is more of a mind screw than an actual screw. Don’t worry, we’re going to help you get your girl to scream out “Sweet Baby Jesus” more times than ever before. Follow me on this magical ride of seduction and Jedi-mind tricks.



It’s go time.



Heating Up The Oven:


Cooking a Turkey seems like a pretty simple thing right? Not really…If the oven isn’t preheated to the right temperature the Turkey doesn’t cook all the way through and you have a not-so-jerky-turkey on your hands. No gobble gobble for you sir. The female plumbing works very similar to this analogy. You need to get that oven preheated well before the turkey goes in the oven for cooking. The best way to do “preheat your girls oven” is by kissing her slowly in areas she is not used to being kissed in. Passionate little pecks and licks around the collarbone, shoulder blades, behind the knees (huge winner), inside of her thighs and over her underwear will make her go crazy with anticipation. That is the goal here fellas. Make your girl want it and tease her to the point of combustion and I promise your Turkey will cook at temperatures you are not used too.



Stay Emotionally Connected During Sex:



A big mistake us guys make in the heat of the moment, is we start to become emotionally disconnected and more just focused on the sport of the sex and reaching climax. The plumbing works very differently with guys and girls in the sense that girls climax much easier when they feel comfortable and have a sense of trust with the guy. Guys being the sick animals we are, we just need a warm, wet place and off we go. Not much of a motive is ever needed for guys to do the horizontal shuffle.



Master The Foreplay:



If you are still one of those guys that races a girls underpants off and hurries a quick finger into la la land, well then you should go buy a hammer today and repeatedly hit yourself in the dick with it. That was a bad move in middle school my friend so grow the fuck up. For the majority of all women, the key to climax lies with those pretty lips the medical industry calls a clitoris. By becoming an enthusiastic cunning linguist master, you will be getting your girl to bite the pillow to the point of ecstasy.


Here is the big tip that you should never forget. Ready? Have you stopped hitting yourself in the crotch with the hammer at this point? Ok good…here it is… Once the girl has climaxed once from clitoral stimulation before sex, she will reach multiple orgasms with much greater ease during sex. Stay mindful of that area though, even while you engage in sex. Consider picking up a a vibrating finger toy at some point when you and your girl are ready to step your freak up.


Take these tips and cherish them. They will change the frequency of how much your girl is showing the “O” Face.


All this talk of “O” face and finger vibrators has got me all hot and bothered. Anyone up for going out for pink tacos?


Pics via 1, 2, 3, 4


By Mr. Puddy


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